I feel like I'm losing my mind right now. I can't stop eating sugar-loaded food.

TL;DR of my weight loss journey: I peaked at around 140kg at the age of 22-23. That was when I joined a gym and started to lose weight. I didn't know ANYTHING about exercise or nutrition. Over time I started to learn, and slowly improve my diet ( nice thing about being 140kg: you can lose weight by only eating a big mac with fries ONCE a day ) and I reached 120kg within 14-15 months. It took me another year and a half to reach 110kg, and there I stalled for a really long time, bouncing between 105 and 110.

Around 1 year ago, I managed to push down further, and my weight was bouncing between 102-104, and that's where it stayed. I struggled to control/improve my diet any further, and no matter what I attempted it felt like I would give in to cravings within a week at best. I saw 99.6kg on the scale on one glorious day, but that's about it.

Around 6 weeks back, I had a mild shoulder injury that prevented me from playing table tennis (I play 8-12 hours per week) or lifting, and during the 2 weeks that I was resting, I gained weight and rapidly climbed up to 108kg. Ever since then, it feels like something's broken in my head. I can't even exercise the moderate control I had over my diet earlier, with cravings becoming irresistible and preventing me from thinking or focusing on work. I literally walked back and forth from a store to my apartment 3 times trying to avoid buying some ice cream and couldn't hold out in the end.

When I checked my weight 3 days ago I was at 111kg, and now I'm just scared to check because I know it's not going to be lower. I don't understand why some kind of "switch" just flipped in my head destroying the little self control I had earlier and I don't know what the hell to do. I'm drinking plenty of water. I'm eating veggies with my meals and taking psyllium husk as a supplement, and I'm trying like hell to just EAT LESS CARBS. Not "no carbs", right now I'd just be happy with not eating a freaking dessert after every meal.

submitted by /u/RHAINUR
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