Monday is my first day out of limbo and I’m ready to get shit done!
Sorry for the long slog of text coming up but I just wanted to write this out somewhere.
Since the beginning of this year, I’ve (28F, 169cm/86-90kg) held myself to a pretty strict 1450-1600 calorie budget, and let me tell you, it’s worked wonders. In a past life, I was 113kg but I’ve been stalling at around 90kg since October. It took a couple of months for my body to really get into the swing of things but once I got to around mid-March, I was down to my lowest weight since high school. Felt great, felt confident. Even got a brand new job in my preferred field after being more or less unemployed for 8 months. Then, out of the blue, my partner of 2 years decided to tell me the feelings he once had were gone.
I was absolutely destroyed. My first real heartbreak and from someone I’d happily chosen to be with for the rest of my life. The loss of appetite was real, I could not believe how sick I felt all day for a couple of weeks. Once that passed, I had fallen off the wagon and I had no idea how to climb back up. With the current state of things, we stayed amicable and friendly, as he needed to find some other place to live and the rental market is weird.
So, I’ve been living in what I’ve been calling “limbo” for over a month. Because we went from 50/50 partners to housemates, and with my new job, all my usual eating routine disappeared. We are getting Hello Fresh delivered, and in the mornings, we’d decide what meal we were having, but by lunch time, dinner plans for him or me had been made elsewhere. I can’t believe how many Hello Fresh bags I’ve thrown out, unopened, or how many times I’ve left the office for a quick, unhealthy lunch. So much damn money!
But, my friends, during this limbo, I’ve told myself to be kind. I know, you shouldn’t say you’re gonna start Monday when you can start today, but it’s given my time to research and find out what goals I want for myself. I’ve had the guilt-free takeaway and chocolate bars. I’ve felt the effect of it on my body and I know that it’s not right for me to continue. I have a gym membership that I wasn’t using because, to be honest, I wanted to be home with him rather than go spend an hour becoming healthier. During this last month, I’ve taken my gym clothes to work and headed straight there right afterwards. I’ve started slow to figure out what machines I want to use and what’s the best time to go as to not be crowded. Now I know what my work out routine is going to be when I start on Monday and I am SO PUMPED!
As for food, Hello Fresh does wonders for me, and for the 2 serves each meal gives, I’ve been choosing easy-to-have-for-leftover dishes rather than the hearty plates I had been choosing. Now I can make dinner last 2 nights or take leftovers to work!
I’ve got my tape measure at the ready for Monday morning, and my scales have new batteries.
Tonight is the first night he’s in his new place. Tomorrow, I’m giving myself time to grieve if I need to. Monday begins a new me.
[link] [comments]
from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3fngRt8
No comments: