Food shamed pretty openly at Thanksgiving…
Hey Loseit,
Me: 31/F/5’5/151 (lowest 139 earlier this year)
This has been bothering me since yesterday and I’d love to get it off my chest. I gained ~10 pounds over the last 6 months or so. I was in a bad place with work and life stress. I’m starting to get back into healthier habits but I’m really proud that I’ve been kinder to myself about my body and where I’m at than I’ve been able to be historically.
I’ve gotten back into a workout routine that I actually enjoy and I find getting that started always helps me eat better because I’m feeling better and proud of my workouts. Anyways, all that being said, I did wake up super early yesterday to get in a workout before thanksgiving and went into the day knowing I was happy with my workout and was going to enjoy the food and not overthink things.
When I arrived there were snacks out that everyone was eating but I didn’t have any because they didn’t appeal to me and I was too excited for the main event! It was a large group of about ~12 people at my fiancé’s parents house. It was all his family. I sat next to his grandma and she immediately gasped and pointed out my plate to several people and told them there was no way I was going to finish it… I told her I was and made a few jokes about it. Then later I was going to sneakily go back for a bit more of a few of my favorites. I was embarrassed so I was going to just eat it in the kitchen but someone else asked what I was getting more of (because they were going to get seconds in a bit too) so I figured I had to bring it back to the table. Needless to say grandma made a scene of that too and pointed out to several people that I had gotten even more and was incredulous that I was still eating more :(
Then later, we were playing cards and I heard her telling a cousin on the couch that I had eaten two plates and was going to get fat. I think she meant it as a good natured joke…
THEN at the end of the night she made a comment about how I must be stuffed and asked if I had dessert… and I said YEAH I HAD A BROWNIE because fuck off, yeah I had some dessert.
At the time I played it all off as jokes and even leaned into it which in hindsight I think was my knee jerk reaction because I was so uncomfortable and caught off guard that someone would be so open about food shaming. I’m hindsight I’m super bothered by it all. How rude and inappropriate. I have to see her again next weekend and am going to say something if she decides to comment on my plate again. Nothing aggressive but I do want to squash it with something like “I’d prefer not to hear any comments on how much I’m eating, it’s uncomfortable”
Any tips? Commiseration? Either way, thanks for listening to my vent.
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