Please help me figure out what I should do

I'm a 20 year old female, weighing 158 lbs. I've always been big since birth. I have PCOS for which I take Metformin and Myoinositol. I have a family history of diabetes but I don't have it. I don't like to look at myself in the mirror and I hate shopping because it brings up the discussion of size. Every single person I've dined with has told me I eat way too less of a portion for someone my age. I've been told that toddlers eat a bigger portion than I do. I eat out maybe once in a week or lesser, and I don't drink or smoke. I'm currently studying for one of the toughest professional exams and working a full time job at a Big 4 which is extremely pressurising and tedious. My working hours usually go from 7 in the morning to midnight, which doesn't leave me any time to study either. We also work from home during the weekends. I've also noticed that ever since I've started with this job, I get hungry a little more often in the day and I choose to snack on a fruit. Please note before this I've rarely ever felt hungry, I used to eat at meal times as a part of routine. Please help me figure out a way where I can have a holistic approach to weight loss, so I can be consistent. I want this not to be a diet, but a lifestyle. I've tried working out but somehow I always fall out of the routine. I need something which doesn't require time during the day because honestly I don't have it. The only meals I have control over are my breakfast and lunch. I really don't know what to do, everytime I think of something new or any improvement in my lifestyle, I tend to fall out of it due to a routine change or mood swings. I also tend to have this all or nothing attitude, i.e. if I can't start the day perfectly, I won't even try during the rest of the day. Please help me with tips regarding this.

I really want to change for the better and I want to do it to feel better and happier about myself. Thank you for your help!

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