Finding community in COVID weight gain

M26, 6'4", SW: 345, CW: 242, GW: 180 pre covid weight: 198lbs

This year has been shit. 100%. There were a lot of things to deal with, and society dealing with COVID magnified the things by like 300x.

I've gained about 40lbs as of this morning. I have kept track, and I started to gain in June. The novelty of working from home had passed, and I was having issues with my boss and coworkers that I'd never had before. I'm in my first relationship, and my boyfriend moved in with me in March. That has been...something else to deal with. I'm tired. I got back on my antidepressant, though I've been bad about taking the entire dose (shoots my libido through the roof, that's another story).

I eat when I'm stressed.

I lost the majority of my weight in 2018-19, and was maintaining really well. Then the shit hit like a hurricane.

I have tried to pay more attention now. Eating makes me stop focusing on the issues at hand, and just on eating the food. I feel good because I was able to buy the food. It's so fun to indulge. It makes me feel happy like a drug (having done drugs I can say it's very similar for me). I have a problem.

I put my fitbit back on, tracking my calories again and getting daily exercise again. I'm feeling better, and I'm dealing with the weight.

People are telling me they can't see it. I am tall, so loss and gain take a while to show. But I had to buy larger pants and shirts. I only went up one waist size, but still. I carry a lot in my waist and thighs, and in my chest (which I hate).

I have found something comforting that I never had when I was a heavy teenager. A lot of people seem to have gained weight. We share how much we've gained and laugh. That brings me a lot of comfort. It makes me feel like I'm not alone, which I really need to feel to keep my sanity.

I'm going to go for a walk tonight. It was a great day with my diet as well.

We press on. But it's just nice to know that I'm not alone for once.

submitted by /u/mangopiratebird
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